So yeah. Today is Friday and I had lots to explore online. For instance, I found this (no idea how I came to actually BE at this site, but OMG once there, I fell deeper into the rabbit hole). Listen to this stranger-than-fiction-truth! I got this from the Twin Stuff site:

Most Sets of Twins and Multiples Carried by One Woman
Mrs. Fyodor Vassilyev (also known as Mrs. Feodor Vassiliev or Mrs. Fyodor Vassilet) of Shuya, Russia (1707-1782), 16 sets of twins, 7 sets of triplets, 4 sets of quadruplets
OMG — and this is BEFORE Fertility Drugs too!!

Mrs. Vassilyev gave birth to 69 children, 67 of whom survived infancy with most surviving to adulthood.

She was the 1st wife of Mr. Vassiliev, and they lived outside of Shuya, Russia, and were peasants who farmed off the land. The children were born between 1725 and 1765. It was reported and recorded by a monastery in 1782. Empress Ekaterina the 2nd was supposedly very captivated by the story. It is the only authenicated case of a woman having more than 60 children. It is believed that she and her husband eventually split up, as he did remarry.

Other notable families with multiple multiples include Mrs. Mary Jones of Chester, England, who gave birth to 15 sets of fraternal boy-girl twins in the 19th Century and Maddalena Granata (1839-1866) of Nocera Superiore, Italy, who allegedly had 15 sets of triplets.

That’s amazing…

On the writing front, I found a semi-definitive timeframe on when I may hear back on my mss. Silly me, I had no clue before I mailed it off to Michelle Grajkowski of Three Seas and it doesn’t say on the site anywhere. Here’s what I found over at the RWA site

Estimated Response Time:
Two-to-three months

Currently, We Are Looking to Represent:
Romance, including contemporary, historical, category, western, romantic comedy, romantic suspense and inspirational. Also, we are looking for women’s fiction, mysteries and children’s stories. Basically, we are looking for a story we fall in love with.

And finally today, I saw Munich. All I can say is… WOW. Very emotional and very, very good. I especially liked the way Spielberg filmed it. It was like you were RIGHT there in these different European cities (Paris, Italy, etc) and Israel. And you definitely felt like you were back in the early- to mid-70s. It was wonderful and poignant. I highly recommend it.

I’ve got a PAISLEY magic woman
Got me so blind I can’t see…

I was bored today… I mean, just in general. Not with anything on my writing, etc. But I was in the mood, you know, just to be freaking entertained. So I hit all the Entertainment sites I could find online. Well, that’s not true. I can find a LOT — but I can only take so much. Here are some fun things I found that I wanted to comment on. Look at this:

Jonathan Rhys-Meyers denies he’s dating his “Match Point” co-star Scarlett Johansson, and says those love scenes weren’t very romantic to film. “And as for that bit where she blindfolds me, I felt like a total prat,” he told the Scottish Daily Record. “It was all done between 9.30 and 11.30 on a Monday morning, so it was hot tea in plastic cups and biscuits in between sessions with Scarlett. It looks sexy on film but it certainly wasn’t sexy to shoot.”

Ok, so he thinks that’s not sexy. But how cute is the way he phrased it? Tea and Biscuits. I love that. It’s sooooo much more romantic than “Coffee and a McMuffin” or “Milk and Toast”. No… from now on, I want all my men to bring me Tea and Biscuits! And I couldn’t care less if it was in plastic cups or not. It’s so….21st century Jane Austen isn’t it????

Nexxxxxxt:

JERUSALEM (AP) — Sharon Tendler met Cindy 15 years ago. She said it was love at first sight. This week she finally took the plunge and proposed. The lucky “guy” plunged right back. In a modest ceremony at Dolphin Reef in the southern Israeli port of Eilat, Tendler, a 41-year-old British citizen, apparently became the world’s first person to “marry” a dolphin. Dressed in a white dress, a veil and pink flowers in her hair, Tendler got down on one knee on the dock and gave Cindy a kiss. And a piece of herring.

“I do love this dolphin. He’s the love of my life,” she said Saturday, upon her return to London.

Hrmmm…. I don’t quite know what to say about that except, I wonder why they gave the dolphin such a girly name?

Ahhhh-Neeexxxxt:

BLADENSBURG, Md. (AP) — Andrew Cohen says he can rebuild his Bladensburg auto parts store; what matter most is that his 13-year-old alligator, Wally, is OK. Fire damaged Andy’s Auto Parts yesterday but Prince George’s County firefighters were able to prevent the fire from spreading to the office where Wally is kept in a 500-gallon aquarium. Fire Department spokesman Mark Brady says firefighters did the smart thing and left Wally in place after determining he was safe.

Cohen says the important thing is no one was hurt. He says he has owned Wally since he was three inches long. Wally is now more than four-feet long and serves as the store’s “junkyard dog.” Indeed, a sign over his tank reads, “refund department.”

And… more gossip:

According to a hip-hop site, Patrick Swayze has been “experimenting with rap music.” This story goes on to say that “In U.S. rap vernacular, the term ‘Swayze’ means to ‘leave’ or ‘disappear,’ cleverly derived from the title of his 1990 hit film Ghost.”

and:

British movie fans have voted Tom Cruise the most irritating star. Something tells me a few folks on the other side of the pond might agree.

(me, me, me!)

And it’s bad, bad Leroy PAISLEY
The baddest (wo)man in the whole damn town
Badder than old king kong
And meaner than a junkyard dog (or alligator)

Ick! Well, my lips are chapped, right? So I put this Mentholatum stuff on them and WOW, it feels super! But it’s kinda goopy so it kinda slips into my mouth at the corners and then UGH I taste it and GRRROOOSSSSSS! Me no likey. Ick. So let’s move on…

On the writing front (that should definitely be a title, right? And when I’m blocked, it’ll be All’s Quiet On The Writing Front. See? It’s marvelous!

Where was I?

Oh yeah… OTWF (gotta love acronyms!) - I got all the bugs and kinks worked out of the ms itself… now I just have to fix it up and print it out. Hopefully Michelle G will ask for the full. But hey, if she doesn’t like it, that’s totally ok. I’ll keep looking. I’d just liked Michelle from the get-go when I first met her back in ‘03 and thought I’d see if she was interested. We’ll see. I’m also finishing up another story I’d put on hold a while back. I’m thinking of letting it stay plain romance (not erotica romance) — it’s pretty much a paranormal, as well. And a romantic comedy. So hmmm, we’ll see what I do with that.

Someone (Nienke) asked me recently when I was going to put up pics and a real bio of myself. Well, hmmm… I’d have to say that it’s not really that high on my priority list. At least not at the moment. Maybe after I make the sale this year (optimism extreme, eh?) I’ll move it up on my to-do list. Do they still do those glamour pics at the mall? Will they wrap a red feather boa around my neck? Paint a heart-shaped mole on my chin?? Stick a pink-plumed cowboy hat on me and dip me in rhinestones????

Shriek!

Yeah. I’ll uh, get back to you on that.

Taking liberties with songs again… (indulge me)

Dear Sir or Madam, will you read my book?
It took me years to write, will you take a look?
Based on a novel by a (wo)man named PAISLEY
And I need a job, so I want to be a paperback writer,
Paperback writer.

YeeHaw! I’m so glad to kick 2005 in the ass on its way out that I can barely contain myself! WOOOP! So yeah.. it’s time to officially start the ol’ resolutions (and I don’t mean the BS ones I listed in yesterday’s entry). Nope. The real thang. Can’t quit smoking — (already did that). I could always do the “routine” one and *Get fit and healthy*. Ok… that one is a given. I’ll have to do that one. I SHOULD do it without having to make a resolution… duh. Oh… guess my biggie would be to SELL MY BOOK this year. Yeah. That’s something I’d LOVE to do! Okay… that will be my priority resolution. Let’s hope I can see it thru this year!

On the writing front: This is from my email:

Aphrodisia: erotic romance, very sexually explicit. Anything goes as long as it’s legal and promotes pleasure and satisfaction. Contemporary, historical, futuristic, paranormal, multicultural, ménage, light BDSM, etc., are all welcome. Novels approximately 80,000 words; novellas 20,000-30,000 words. Aphrodisia submissions should only be sent to Audrey LaFehr, Hilary Sares or John Scognamiglio.

John Scognamiglio is actively looking for paranormal romances and sci-fi/fantasy romances. Word count: 85,000-100,000.

Soooo that’s a bit of a booger. Because my story is approx 55,000 words and it’s done. If I added to it, it would be padding (noticeably so I’d imagine) and if I cut it to a novella, I think it would be too short to do it justice. It’s like in LIMBO there. Grrr.. but see, I read there were no strict set-in-stone word count limitations. I was over at Lori Foster’s board (where Kate Duffy from Kensington hangs out and I stumbled across this question asked from a subscriber and answered by Kate (whom I’d trust to actually KNOW the score of what’s going on at Kensington). Here’s the notes:

—initial question—-

Posted: Wed Dec 07, 2005 11:17 pm
———————————————
I believe I read on here awhile back that Kensington was starting an Erotica Line. I’ve got a novella
(35,000words) that would fit. However, I can’t find anywhere that says the editor of this line or even
an address to send the MS to?

—Kate’s Answer:—-

Posted: Thu Dec 08, 2005 1:18 pm
——————————————–
You can send it to either Hilary Sares, John Scognamiglio or Audrey LaFehr. They are the three
editorsacquiring for this line. Publishers’ addresses can be found on the copyright page of every
book they publish.

There are no strict length requirements.

Kate

I truly hope it’s doable to have 55k words because I’m targetting the Aphrodisia line with that story and it’s absolutely (IMHO) perfect for that line. Meh.. I’m not going to worry about it now. I’ll take it one day at a time. It’s all I can do, right?

All is quiet on New Year’s Day
A world in PAISLEY gets underway
I want to be with you
Be with you night and day
Nothing changes on New Year’s Day
On New Year’s Day

I don’t know about you, but I for one am totally OK with waving goodbye to 2005. I certainly hope 2006 is much better for all of us! I’ve been making my New Year’s Resolutions…. I used these places:

http://resolution.geek-foo.net/ which told me:
In the year 2006 I resolve to:
Become a slut.

And this place: http://www.ryumaou.com/hoffman/resolution.shtml which told me:
I will start kissing strangers again!

So it seems I’m going to be verrrrrra busy in 2006. Heck, I’d wager pretty popular, too.

HEY!! A Shout Out to my WONDERFUL Website Designer, Brandon Dennis of Writer Webs for making this really COOL PAISLEY CURSOR!!! I love it!!!

So… until next year (ain’t that the corniest? Yet, it never gets old to use that line on NYE) ….

Along with wishing you all a very happy and prosperous NEW YEAR I wanted to share this recipe to especially for those who follow the tradition of eating Black Eyed Peas and Cabbage (The black-eyed peas are considered a symbol of good luck; and the cabbage is considered a symbol of money.) I don’t have a cabbage recipe to share, but this is a yummy casserole for black eyed peas — especially for those who don’t particularly like Black Eyed Peas (like Hunter, but he loves this casserole — especially after 4 or 5 scotchs.. go figure).

This is also good to bring to Holiday potlucks and get togethers like: Thanksgiving, Christmas, but ESPECIALLY New Years.

BLACK-EYED PEA /CORNBREAD CASSEROLE

1 pound ground pork sausage I use either SPICY or the 50% less fat Jimmy Dean kind.
1 medium onion, diced
1 cup white cornmeal
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
2 large eggs, lightly beaten
1 cup buttermilk
1/2 cup vegetable oil
1 (15-ounce) can black-eyed peas, drained I use peas with jalapenos already in them… but you can use any type
2 cups (8 ounces) shredded Cheddar cheese
3/4 cup cream-style corn
1/4 cup chopped pickled jalapeno peppers Don’t need to use this if you use the hot sausage or the peas w/jalapenos in them already.
1 (4.5-ounce) can chopped green chiles

COOK sausage and onion in a large skillet over medium-high heat 5 minutes, stirring until sausage crumbles and is no longer pink. Drain.
COMBINE cornmeal, flour, salt, and baking soda.
STIR together eggs, buttermilk, and oil until combined. Add to dry ingredients, stirring just until moistened. (Batter will not be smooth.) Add sausage mixture, peas, and remaining ingredients to batter, stirring well.
POUR into a greased 13- x 9-inch baking dish.
BAKE at 350 degrees for 1 hour or until golden and set.

Hey — tell me if you use it, ok? I wanna know what you think. I think it’s deeeee-lish (I got the recipe from a co-worker about 10 years ago).

In the spirit of New Years…. My song tonight does not have a color in it, but I’m still gonna tamper…..

Should auld acquaintance be forgot
and never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot
and days of Auld Lang Syne.

For Auld Lang Syne, my dear PAISLEY,
for Auld Lang Syne,
we’ll take a cup of HUNTER’S scotch
for Auld Lang Syne.

Who else eats cabbage and black eyed peas on New Years? We have to — every year. It’s tradition. We gotta! I’ll tell ya, though — I’m not that keen on the ol’ black eyed peas (and I’m not talking about the group w/Fergie, etc… although I don’t really care for her — eek, I’m getting sidetracked!) Where was I? Oh yeah… well, I’ve learned to tolerate the cabbage and peas, but Hunter is celebrating with us this year and he’s telling me it’ll take a lot of liquor to make him down those two food items at the dinner table. So.. I’m thinking of mashing it all up and pouring it into a highball for him. Whattaya think? Cabbage-peas-on-the-rocks! Yummy.

On the writing front (and back) I’ve been dutifully editing (thanks to my great friend and kimosabe, S.R. — hey figure it out by looking over there —> on my friend’s list. Duuuuh!) She’s an angel I tell ya and an absolute whiz with the editing. If it was still hip to say it, I’d say: “Dayam, she be da bomb-diggity, yo!” But that’s not hip, and I just look stupid. So fahgettaboutit.

Found this cute little ticker thingie.. and I think I’ll use it to feed my obsession:

Ain’t it cool? So I was asked how I liked AMERICAN GODS (see comment from last entry) and if you come back, Bonnie — I’ll say that it was pretty darn good indeed. I liked it quite a lot. I like Gaiman, but I tell you one thing, I rented NEVERWHERE the “series” (I think it must have been on the BBC or some such) but it looked like it’d been filmed with a camcorder. It was really bad.. and the premise was so good, too! I’m a little sad to see that they did that to his story. But hey, maybe that’s what he wanted? I dunno.. I shudder to think that. But hopefully (fingers crossed) his and Terry Pratchett’s (my other FAVE writer) GOOD OMENS will be a good flick when it comes out. I hope so — Terry Gilliam is directing, and he’s really (IMHO) a visionary. I like his stuff quite a lot!

Wow… I truly did ramble on tonight, didn’t I? Well, I only have a few days left of Dec. EEEEEEEEEEEK! Then it’ll be a couple of weeks of me writing this: January 2005 2006. gah! Gotta hate that!

Until later…. Yeah!

My mind’s such a sweet thing
I wanna do everything
What a beautiful feeling
PAISLEY and clover
Over and over

I really think I should win the lottery. I mean, I’m due for it, I think. Sure it’d help if I actually BOUGHT a ticket, but dadgummit, I hate being broke. Blah. I feel like that chick in Jerry Maguire (yeah, her name is Renee Zellwegger, but her CHARACTER’s name in the movie eludes me). Anyway, when she’s in Jerry’s office and she’s telling the football player and his wife that Jerry’s “Broke. Broke, broke, broke. BROKE!” That’s eggggsactly how I feel. And so I need a winning lottery ticket. Yup. Sure do. Or a golden ticket. That’d be cool too. I’d probably eat the wrong thing though… I’m no Charlie Bucket that’s for sure.

Oh! I found some cool stuff whilst surfing ye olde net this afternoon. Look at this! It’s neato-keen!

* These art pieces are all made out of CANS — nothing to hold them together — just stacked cans:
Canned Art

* And this one is chock-full of wonderful sculptures made out of shredded tires! It’s amazing stuff!
Tire Art

I was out blog-hopping and came across the funniest story about what happens when a dog meets baby Jesus and finds him tasty. I laughed til I cried… mainly because I HAVE a dog like this and the Baby Jesus’ “understudy” is hilarious… check it out here!

So yeah, that’s it. I’m off for 4 days. I’ll be buying beaucoup lotto ticcies and praying. Yeah… court went that well. Ugh!

I need to chill…. because…

I like the way your sparkling earrings lay,
against your skin so PAISLEY
and I wanna sleep with you in the desert tonight
with a billion stars all around
’cause I gotta peaceful easy feeling
and I know you won’t let me down
’cause I’m already standing on the ground

Yeah Yeah, I’m still bah-humbugging. I worked all day today with more of the same in store for tomorrow. But then……. THEN…… I’m off for 4 days! YAHOO!

Have you checked out Miss Snark’s CrapFest? OMG it’s great! I’m soooooo happy I didn’t submit my synopsis there (of course, it’s winging it’s way to Michelle G as we speak, so I’m hoping it’s not as bad as some of the synopses I read today). But she tells it like it is — very upfront and in your face — and by dammit, those ppl better listen or get off the proverbial pot! Pfffth!

Nothing new to report, really. Between being entertained with Miss Snark and work, life’s been pretty normal. Tomorrow I have to appear in court! Ohhhh… I hate that whole idea. I’ll let you know — if they let me use sharp things like a keyboard afterwards, that is. Eek!

Til then, my boopies….remember:

Money talks
But it don’t sing and dance
And it don’t walk
And long as I can have you here with me
I’d much rather be
Forever in PAISLEY jeans

* POPS HEAD UP * Is it safe to come out again? No little old ladies with a bargain on the brain and a coupon in their hand, huh? Yippee! I know I’m a Scrooge, but ick… I was so unprepared for it this year. On the other hand, Hunter and I celebrated with some wonderful Mexican Coffee he whipped up for us to sip in front of the fire yesterday. Please try some, it’ll warm you right up! Hunter used big mugs (like 12 oz or so) and added:

Mexican Coffee A La Hunter:
1 jigger (shotglass) of Kahlua
1 jigger of Rum
Coffee (we had Decaf) filled up til about 1-1/2 inches to the rim
3 teaspoons of sugar (or to your taste.. this was pretty sweet)
A big dollop of Whipped Cream
Mix together and put whipped cream on top.

All I can say again is YUMMMMM!

So I was trying to find some good dirt on the latest goings-on in Romance-Land and stumbled across this site: Romance Writer. Where it actually came up with a story on the fly! It’s MAGNIFICENT! Poetry in motion, I tell ya! have a looksee:

It’s called: TROUBLE UNDER THE TREES:

Waiting alone in the chill gloom of the crypt, with the far-off clamour of the playing fields wafting in from outside, Beth thought once more of Lyle ‘Sneaky Legs’ Malone, the bold bandito who had been so gentle in her arms. He was now, according to Countess Genevieve, the hapless captive of mind-devouring space aliens.

Then came a knock at the door, and she shut her eyes tight for one moment of silent prayer. He was here! “Come to me, my perfect little carrot!” he murmured in that unforgettable hypnotic drawl, nervously adjusting his artificial leg, and as he dabbed at her tears with the handkerchief she herself had made for him, she knew that at last he was hers - and that only death could part them.

Amazing, huh? I know! And get this — they do haikus too! Listen to this gem (try to keep up, it’s deep, baby);

The helpless cave speaks
Where smiling caverns flutter.
Does the hard grove dive?

Under the tight hand,
While the sighing maple grows,
I fail; the beach looks.

The dismal rose dreams
Where helpless maples flutter.
Does the dry root crawl?

Wow. No words to describe that one. All that fun and more can be found at FAMILY GAMES. Tell ‘em Romance Writer/Haiku Writer sent you.

OH! Ok.. on the writing front. I mailed my proposal to Michelle Grajkowski yesterday. Yes sirree bobcat I did. Now… I chew off the nails (or rather, what’s left of them). I vowed to get something sent out by the end of the year and by golly, I did it! It’s off and winging it’s way priority-style to Madison, Wisconsin! HOOO YEAH!!

And like I always say:

See that guy all dressed in PAISLEY?
I-ko, i-ko, un-day. he’s not a man;
He’s a lov-in’ ma-chine,
Jock-a mo fee na-né!

…and I’ll be SOOO HAPPY when it’s over! Yeah yeah, I know…

I cooked a big meal tonight for my whole fam damily. I made ham, green beans, mac-n-cheese (homemade, mind you), homemade mashed potatoes and okra. We were stuffed! But yummy — what a great mound of leftovers we’ll have for tomorrow. I absolutely refuse to cook on Christmas Day, on Christmas Day, on Christmas Day in the mornin’..

Oh, I was actually going to write some legit pubbing news today. I wanted to share the line I’m looking at targeting (or hoping my agent — whom I’m hoping will be Michelle G) the new erotica line from Kensington. Here’s what Cynthia Sterling said in her newsletter earlier this month:

Kensington Publishing is calling its new erotic romance line Aphrodisia. The bi-monthly imprint will be available in both trade paper and ebook releases. There are no submission guidelines on the website, but at the RWA National Conference this summer, Editorial Director Kate Duffy said they’re looking for 25,000 word novellas or 90,000 word novels. She will accept material from unagented authors “no matter what the website says.” The website is http://www.kensingtonbooks.com

I love Kensington books.. but their website is pretty… well… it’s not the most user-friendly and it never has any info for writers as far as tip sheets, etc. But who knows.. use the link above and browse around and see what you can find there. Like I said… love the books, but the website (from a writer’s perspective) — meh.. not lovin’ it so much.

Oh! Went to see King Kong. Yes, I cried like a baby! I loved Kong!!! The film itself was awesome, I mean Peter Jackson really did a primo job of capturing the 30s. Take a look:

That’s a street scene in NYC. Ain’t it cool? Really looks like you’re back in the day, huh?

And here’s Kong with those soulful eyes. SOB! This is at the end. DOUBLE-SOB! I was bawling like a baby about this time in the movie…

I gotta go set out the cookies for Santa Baby… Hope he brings you everything you ask for and more!

O Christmas Tree,
O Christmas Tree,
How steadfast are
your branches!
Your boughs are Paisley
in summer’s clime
And through the snows
of wintertime…